They’re called “selfies” and can sometimes be referred to as #selfies. I like to take these to remind myself that even I am not perfect. I know, I know. You’re probably saying to yourself But Jen you’re soooooo pretty. And I agree. I am pretty. Thank you. So are you. We all are. We just don’t always see it.
I could look at that picture and do what magazine editors do before printing a picture on their glossy covers. I could find faults everywhere. I could knit pick all the things that are wrong and magnify them with arrows and I could choose ugly words to define myself.
And just like that I have made myself the ugliest, most gross thing on the planet. Well done.
I could choose something else. I could choose better words. Pretty words. Words that don’t make me feel bad. I could choose to see the whole thing differently, to see me pretty.
And do you see what happened there? Do you see how when I saw myself pretty, so did you see me pretty?
We push a lot of blame on the media for their influence of what is pretty — blame well placed since the definitions they create make pretty a very singular thing. Pretty is long hair. Pretty is straight hair. Pretty is thin. But we too are to blame. Who gave media such control if not us? Pretty doesn’t come defined. It has nothing to do with our hair or our weight. Like the tree that falls in the woods, can someone tell us we’re ugly if we’re not listening.
Being pretty is in the choices we make. Choose to use words that make you pretty. Choose to see your imperfections as perfections. Choose to not accept that being pretty has boundaries. Choose to not be confined or defined. Choose to see you pretty.